The meaning of the lyrics of the song "idontevenknowmyself" by the artist "XChenda"

XChenda's song "idontevenknowmyself" conveys a sense of loss and existential crisis common to many young people.

The intro, consisting of the single phrase "I'm so fing over it," vividly and emotionally conveys the hero's overall state – fatigue, apathy, hopelessness.

The first verse develops this thought. Rapid maturation in a "dark world," a sense of meaninglessness ("Everything I've dealt with has gone nowhere"), fear and self-doubt ("I shake every time we talk") – all of this points to deep depression and anxiety. The phrase "I stand apart from the mistakes that give birth to wars with people I don't know" can be interpreted as a desire to isolate oneself from the outside world, a fear of conflict and misunderstanding.

The chorus is a key part of the song, reflecting its main motif. The hero is ready for self-sacrifice ("I fall, I fall, just to help you"), humiliation ("I crawl"), just to find his place in the world, to understand himself ("I don't even know myself").

The second verse delves into existential questions. "Who was I in a past life?", "Who am I in this fictional world?", "Do I even have a purpose?" – these questions torment the hero, who feels lost and confused. The image of "pop-up guises" emphasizes instability, variability, lack of clear self-determination.

The bridge shatters illusions. Reaching the age of 18, usually perceived as a symbol of freedom and adulthood, turned out to be a disappointment, a "mistake."

The repetition of the chorus at the end of the song reinforces the feeling of hopelessness. The hero is still lost, he has not found answers to his questions and continues to exist in a state of uncertainty and despair.