The meaning of the lyrics of the song "River" (Reka) the performer of the song "Zemfira"

A little mess happened inside of me.

I raise my hands up there, on the lighthouse.

Don't judge me, just tell me, how is that even possible?

This morning a body was found in the river.

And I'm writing a letter to you in my notebook.

And I leave an ellipsis at the end.

And anything but going to sleep.

And I'm searching for your face in my own face.

[Instrumental]

Such a sharp, unheard of pain.

Such a strange desire to fall.

Such a something about me and alcohol,

And this something has power over me.

Lights are turning on in the apartment buildings.

I'm coming out to meet you, unburdened.

Tonight, we will stay alone.

This morning a body was found in the river.

Внутри меня случился маленький бардак.

Я поднимаю руки там, на маяке.

Не осуждай меня, скажи мне, как же так?

Сегодня утром тело найдено в реке.

И я пишу тебе письмо в свою тетрадь.

И оставляю многоточие в конце.

И что угодно - только не ложиться спать.

И я ищу твое лицо в своем лице.

[Istrumental]

Такая острая неслыханная боль.

Такое странное желание упасть.

Такое нечто обо мне и алкоголь,

И это нечто надо мной имеет власть.

В многоэтажках зажигаются огни.

Я выхожу к тебе навстречу налегке.

Сегодня ночью мы останемся одни.

Сегодня утром тело найдено в реке.

In the song "Reka" (River), Zemfira crafts a stifling atmosphere of anxiety and despair, utilizing the river as a metaphor for death and irreversibility. The "little mess" within the lyrical heroine symbolizes the emotional chaos and turmoil caused by a tragic event – a body found in the river.

The image of the lighthouse, towards which the heroine raises her hands, can be interpreted in two ways. On the one hand, the lighthouse represents hope and salvation, something the heroine instinctively reaches for in search of a way out of the darkness. On the other hand, the lighthouse also serves as a harbinger of storms, a symbol of danger and the inevitability of fate.

The phrase "Don't judge me, tell me how did this happen?" is addressed to an unknown interlocutor, perhaps the deceased, perhaps to the heroine herself. It expresses a plea for understanding, a desire to share the burden of responsibility for what has transpired.

The letter written in a notebook and the ellipsis at the end symbolize incompleteness, an attempt to make sense of the tragedy, to find words of comfort, but in vain. The heroine fights the desire to give up, to "go to sleep," searching for answers within herself ("And I search for your face in my own").

The "sharp, unheard-of pain" and the "strange desire to fall" directly indicate the depth of the heroine's experience, bordering on an emotional breakdown. Alcohol, mentioned in the text, becomes not an escape, but only an amplifier of pain, emphasizing the hopelessness of the situation.

The song's ending brings us back to the image of the river, creating a cyclical structure. The night, the loneliness, and the ominous "This morning, a body was found in the river" all contribute to a sense of despair, of fleeing from reality, where the river becomes not only the site of tragedy but also a symbol of the relentless flow of time that cannot be reversed.